I glance at path laid out
before me, not knowing where it will lead, peering up at the glorious sunny day
and breathing in the fragrant, dewy grass.
In the garden behind Avondale Presbyterian Church, there’s labyrinth
that mirrors the famous one painted on the floor of Chartres Cathedral in
France. It’s Wednesday morning. The only
day of the week where I have 3 hours of alone time – no kids, no work (well,
always housework, but it can wait), nowhere to be. This is the day I’m attempting to set aside
for practicing disciplines of silence, solitude, worship, meditation, and
prayer.
I pick up a guide from
the box beside the labyrinth, tentative about stepping on to the first
cobblestone. “You will show me the path of life, you will fill me with joy in
your presence.” Psalm 16:11. Yes, you
will show me where I am on the path; you will be with me as I walk.
As I enter in, I’m
breathing deeply, noticing my surroundings, until I find that I must look at
where my feet are going to make sure I stay on the path. The first portion inward has short twists and
turns that beg my attention. Hmmm, this
is interesting… I’m journeying inward and there seems to be a lot of detail to
this path. I’m feeling anxious. My first
tendency is to want to skip and jump across this part to the longer stretches
of path that wind around the outermost part of the circle.
God gently nudges me,
“This inner work is hard. There are habits and patterns in your life that need
attention. You often skip this part to more exciting things, but I’m with you
in the everyday. The mundane. In the
details and the inner workings of your heart.
It’s just as important and I want to transform you there.” He goes on, “See how you’re circling back
around, orbiting around the same spot? These patterns and issues will creep
back up unless you pay attention to them and invite me in.” The whole time I’m
walking and pondering this, the center of the labyrinth, the very core of it,
stays in my peripheral vision. I’m circling it – “Jesus you are always right
there, right at the core. You dwell in me. You are there as I examine my
idolatries, as I confess my sins, as I notice my addictions, as I do the inner
work.”
I make my way beyond the
center to the outer ring and find myself in the most divine shade given by
beautiful green trees above my head. The
grass here is greener, a cool breeze blow, it feels like a covering…”You hide
me in the shadow of your wings. You make me lie down in green pastures, you
lead me beside still waters, you restore my soul.” In this place I sensed God
saying, “As you venture out, I will restore you, I will shepherd you, I will
replenish you.” I stood there for a very
long time. “Write this promise on my
heart, Lord.”
I walked for quite a
while that morning. There’s something about walking and listening that feels
dynamic to me. There’s momentum and
movement. A sense that I’m not stuck and that God has me on a path and that
path is going somewhere. God gave me
questions to ponder. He reminded me of his presence. He used the analogy of the
path to give me a deeper understanding of where we are in relationship with
each other right now. I made a commitment
to invite God into those intricate spaces of my life that need more attention,
pruning and transformation. I thanked
Him for his continual presence with me as I venture out and use my unique and
creative gifts to serve him. In walking
the labyrinth that day, I truly experienced that part of the verse we used in
our last women’s retreat -- “Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it.
Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting
on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”
written by: Laura Strahl
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